:: GussetBLOG ::

:: Saturday, February 01, 2003 ::

SHOCK NEWS!

Apparently Matty Boom Batty ain't gettin in no plane.

Unless we drug his milk.

:: Spokesy 1.2.03 [Arc]    ::
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I pitty the foo

:: popcorn 1.2.03 [Arc]    ::
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Ok,

Now after the last couple of posts this is going to look really bad, but what the hell, I'm going to post it anyway:

I persuaded a mate to have a B A Baracus haircut and he did it!

These are the before photo's:-

So Matty Boom Batty has short hair to start with...





Now for the inbetween stages, these have been cleaned up with clippers, but are before the BIC gets any action...





This is the second inbetween stage, we've lathered Mr Boom Batty up, and are ready to go with Mr BIC...





Now here we are hard at work with Mr BIC...





And here we go for the finished results, yes you are truly about to see Mr Matty Baracus...

Go on look...

I dare you...

(Please note: Spider-man has asked that you do not mention his kinky-ness to anyone)







And now for the final countdown...

The pictures you never thought you would see..

No, not Mr Boom Batty involved in sweet lovin with sheep...

But Mr Boom Batty Baracus and Friends...







I really have to stop posting this rubbish when I am drunk, it's not good.

Hope you had fun,

Bye bye,

The SPOKESTER! aka El Spokeserino, The Roonster, Big Daddy Spokes, The One Who Hath Spoken or Spokesillicious.

:: Spokesy 1.2.03 [Arc]    ::
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Oooooookaaaaaaaaaay

Step away from the bong with your hands above your head.

:: popcorn 31.1.03 [Arc]    ::
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IMPORTANT GUSSET FLASH!

Following recent news in the amazing world of film-making, bristol's premier glitch-hop duo

GUSSET

have been commissioned to provide a soundtrack for one of Hollywood's biggest blockbusters for 2003.

Recent disagreements at Universal Studio's have resulted in the firing of the composer of the original score for this major motion picture, due to the studio feeling that the picutre required an abstract, hip-hop breaks influenced soundtrack. After the recent success of so-called rapper "Eminem" and the critically-acclaimed movie "8-Mile", the studio required the potential for a chart position scoring single and accompanying album.

This resulted in some major head-scratching for the producers of the film, until one of their assistants chanced upon the Gusset website accidentally whilst looking for p0rn.

After quickly finishing himself off at the site of Dan's manly physique (well, the guy was only human, unlike Dan), he decided to listen to the MP3's available on the Music page. To cut a long story short, the assistant presented this to his boss (the MP3's, not his spent man-juice). A whirlwind of phone calls ensued and following negotiations, between the Gusset lawyers and those of Universal Studio's, a deal was made and we are proud to release for your eyes only the cover of the soundtrack album:-

The first single to promote this movie will be Black Betty, which will feature a unique sample of Dan shouting "Oi! Ya big green nancy boy, I can see your bell-end sticking out of the leg of your purple pants! Ow, put me down! No, don't step on my nads, leave me one please or my wife'll kill me! ARRRGGHH!"

Believe me this really has to be heard to be believed.

:: Spokesy 30.1.03 [Arc]    ::
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APB: All officers are to be on the lookout for a caucasion male, 6'2", light brown hair, in posession of an elephant

:: popcorn 30.1.03 [Arc]    ::
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Feb 3rd is donkey pr0n day

:: popcorn 30.1.03 [Arc]    ::
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There's a damn good reason they put that 3m high fence there, you fucking idiot

:: popcorn 30.1.03 [Arc]    ::
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I'm not the biggest fan of Lindows (after all who'd want to buy a Lotus and tune it till it ran like a metro?), but the guy incharge has come up with this.
What's quite good is if you just want to watch a DVD it won't bother booting the PC bit.
Good step toward "living room PC's", shame they made it look like a toaster constructed from Duplo.

:: popcorn 30.1.03 [Arc]    ::
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Dam this stupid machine...

But anyway, you're not really threatening me, coz I'll always rather do metal than your wierdo music anyway (Shock, horror!)
so hooray for the Virgin Blood Cocktail Blues! Hoorah for the Metal Monkey Fisting rap!

But I listened to your funk tune... mmmm want it more funky?
I know just the guy...

:: Dash 30.1.03 [Arc]    ::
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U.N. Orders Wonka to Submit to Chocolate Factory Inspections

Metal Song Title Generator (as used to make up titles of songs we threaten Dave he will have to sing)

:: Dan 30.1.03 [Arc]    ::
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Thank you,

I will continue to faff around with it more over the next few days.

Now, we have one track for our next e.p.

:: Spokesy 29.1.03 [Arc]    ::
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Much better, I like that now. Kicks ass!

:: Dan 29.1.03 [Arc]    ::
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For those of you not Gussetly inclined, you may ignore the following:-

For you Popey, however, you must download this, you little giraffe!

I took some of your advice, but their are some parts I ignored because I wanted to wantonly flaunt them.

Take care,

:: Spokesy 29.1.03 [Arc]    ::
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Popey:
Lick it, nubbin head!

Joke:
see above

:: Spokesy 29.1.03 [Arc]    ::
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Spokes:
I listened to the new track. Have to say, not your best, but could do something with it. It’s nice and funky when it gets going, I think the intro is a little too distorted (could do with running more clean sounding to start then getting ripped up as it goes on), drums are good but could change a bit (drop some beasts out on some bars or put some fills in if you can do that without making it sound like a Casio keyboard), and I like the screeching noise but its mixed a little high.
Keep up the good work!

Joke:
Texas Medicine

An Israeli doctor says "Medicine in my country is so advanced that we can take a kidney out of one man, put it in another, and have him looking for work in six weeks."

A German doctor says "That is nothing, we can take a lung out of one person, put it in another, and have him looking for work in four weeks."

A Russian doctor says "In my country, medicine is so advanced that we can take half a heart out of one person, put it in another, and have them both looking for work in two weeks."

The Texas doctor, not to be outdone, says "You guys are way behind, we recently took a man with no brain out of Texas, put him in the White House for 2 years, and now half the country is looking for work."

:: Dan 29.1.03 [Arc]    ::
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Ooh, we've all been busy today then.

Popey: Neighbours was very dull, no Holly.

:: Spokesy 28.1.03 [Arc]    ::
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Thanks for the Redmeat link Popcorn, I've not seen that for ages... something else to keep up with in works time now!

Spokes: Was Neighbours any good today?

:: Dan 28.1.03 [Arc]    ::
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..and there's more

It's the way I blog 'em...

:: popcorn 28.1.03 [Arc]    ::
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Ooh look, loads more links, now sorted by category as well!
<-------------

:: Dan 28.1.03 [Arc]    ::
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Got up at 9:50 and decided to "work from home".

Home and Away was fairly poor but I'm looking forward to Neighbours (well, it does have Holly Valance!)

:: Spokesy 28.1.03 [Arc]    ::
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Spokes, I thought you were back in work today?

:: Dan 28.1.03 [Arc]    ::
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In the time between my last post and this one, I have written a new Gusset track,

so Popey, and anyone else who fancies torturing their ears, have a listen to Spokes Funk

You'll recognise some of the guitar samples from Friday and yes it is supposed to be so cheesy at the start.

Enjoy

:: Spokesy 28.1.03 [Arc]    ::
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Good God man! Pace yourself.

:: popcorn 28.1.03 [Arc]    ::
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Oooh!!!!

Look over there

<-------------------------------

More links added and in alphabetical order, whup de f**kin doo!

I'm bored.

:: Spokesy 28.1.03 [Arc]    ::
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dunno, I read about it here


BTW if anyone is looking for cheap comp goodies www.ebuyer.com is a good bet. Cheapest place I've seen stuff in a while (first sub£40 256MB of PC2100 I've seen in about a year) My order for a window kit goes in tomorrow.

:: popcorn 27.1.03 [Arc]    ::
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Yeah, did anything like that happen here? The Nat West ATMs in Clifton were out yesterday evening; one just a blank screen, the other hung during the boot sequence. It’s probably something totally different but that story in the Indy made me wonder.

:: Dan 27.1.03 [Arc]    ::
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Things are fine (actually better than fine I've just been given a broadband router/firewall/wireless point for home by one of our suppliers!) Slapper has had no real effect (beside the general slowing of the net). Apparently a bunch of ATMs went down in the states for the weekend because of it.

:: popcorn 27.1.03 [Arc]    ::
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How are things in SysAdmin world? Did you have any problems with this Popcorn?

:: Dan 27.1.03 [Arc]    ::
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In case you didn't know, last night was the Superbowl. Every year the major hollywood studios advertise their biggest films for the coming year, if you'd like a look at The Matrix Reloaded and The Hulk, amongst others then try this.

Go on treat yourself, it is Monday after all.

:: Spokesy 27.1.03 [Arc]    ::
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One for Popcorn here.

:: Dan 27.1.03 [Arc]    ::
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